Kids Are Our Future

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts. “– Winston Churchill

I like the quote and believe that as human being, we should try our best to be our best. I also want to pass this value to my children and share my thought with those who have same believe.

Needs and Motivators

In Understand Children’s Needs, we discussed children’s basic needs, which are the key motivators including emotional drivers and materialistic motivators. All of them are powerful forms of encouragement.

Some of the motivators:

Health – to stay healthy is a must for one’s life

Happiness – everyone wants to be happy, this is one of the most important emotional drivers

Success – the desire to do something valuable to receive recognition and feel self-fulfillment and increase self-esteem, which are basic needs for a person’s self-awareness. Teens want to succeed in their schools, and gain recognition from their family, school teachers and peers

Love – this is the most powerful emotional need for everyone, no exception for teens, they need love from parents, family, friends etc.

Freedom – People want to control and not to be controlled, teens do not want to be controlled by their parents, they want to be independent

Security –People want be safe and certain at something and no worries, insecure situation lead to teens’ stress

New experiences – people want to know what they do not know, everyone has curiosity

Praise for Effort, not for Innate Ability

Because innate ability is out of our control, I think when comes to motivate ourselves including teenagers, we should stress effort not innate ability. Effort and motivation are crucial to success. Motivating teens to increase effort and try their best to achieve is what I believe, which is one of the most crucial motivators and can be nurtured.

Parents should praise teenagers for their effort, not for their innate abilities. Because by doing so, parents can teach teens with a greater sense of control over their lives and it also leads to improved teens’ study habits and grades. Teens will know they are the important control factor towards their success, therefore work hard and wisely for their goals.

Although certain innate advantages do exist in some children, by educational research calling attention to them is demonstrably unhelpful to achievement. Both children with and without innate advantages benefit from developing a mindset that equates success with effort while are hurt by a mindset that equates success with innate ability.

8 Ways to Motivate Teenagers

I think most of parents agree that the cause of their children’s underachievement in school is often simply a lack of motivation. What can parents do to motivate their teens? Here are some ideas I want to share with you.

1. Be your teenager’s supporter

Teenagers are different with young kids. A teenager wants to be treated like an “adult”. I think “respecting your teenager “is the key to build a trust relationship between parents and your teens. Parents should give your teenagers as much support as you can, not control but guide your teens.

2. Expose your teenager to various ideas and areas

Sometimes a teenager lacks motivation because he or she hasn’t yet been exposed to what might be a life passion. Look for different programs, give your teen a chance to try them, and keep an open mind, to help your teen to find his or her interests and passion.

3. Help your teenager make connection between schoolwork and his interests

Sometimes children lack motivation because they do not see a connection between the work they are being asked to do and their interests and goals. A teenager who wants to be a doctor should know that math and science is important in those jobs. Parents may give examples how these courses help.

4. Teach your teenager responsibility

Parents should try to make your teenager understand that freedom and power brings along some responsibilities. If your teen wants to make his or her decisions, the teen will have to take the responsibility for them.

5. Guide your teenager to find his goals

Individuals who have goals are highly motivated because they know what they want and work hard towards the goals. For most of teenagers, they do not know what they want to be yet, they are exploring and trying to find their values and believes and their future paths. They are usually driven by the sheer joy of participating in something they love now, and do not consider them in a long run. Parents should talk to your teens about things they enjoy right now and guide them to find what they believe about their life and set up their goals as soon as they can.

6. Set high expectations

High standards lead to high performance. If parents set clear goals and expectations for their teens and support them to achieve their goals, the teenagers become successful. This success motivates teens to feel fulfillment and do even better.

7. Use short-term goals and rewards

Sometimes a teenager gets overwhelmed by a large task and gives up before he or she even begins. Help your teen separate the task into a series of smaller tasks. Make each small task a goal and try to setting an age-appropriate reward for that goal may help.

8. Help your teenager learn to manage time

When they start school, some children usually had few problems keeping up with school work because they could learn quickly and easily, so they did not get chance to learn to manage their time in order to get work done. After they become teenagers, they face more challenge tasks, they may feel overwhelmed by the work they need to complete and do not know how to set time aside to complete their tasks. Teaching your teenager how to create and use a time-management schedule will be helpful.

Summary

Children are natural learners. Motivating teenagers to try their best and be best of them is the key to achievement. Parents should foster a supportive climate in which you serve as supporter and children have the opportunity to explore and gain their own experience, which help them develop healthily.

To learn more parenting skills, please  refer to great parenting books.

Related Posts

1. Parenting Teenagers
2. How to Help Teenagers Manage Stress?
3. How to Connect with your Teenagers?
4. How to Motivate Kids?
5. What do Teenagers Need?
6. Motivate Kids to be Ambitious, Confident, Patient and Persistent
7. Motivate Ourselves to Set up a Good Role Model