Kids Are Our Future

Different children’s personalities need a different parenting approach. Parents can provide their best care for children with various temperamental characteristics by learning about differences in temperament.

What is temperament?

Temperament refers to individual characteristics that are assumed to have a genetic basis, determines the individual’s affective, attention and motor responses in various situations. An individual’s temperament style can be observed in infancy and remains similar throughout the life.

We know some children who are overly intense having a”short fuse,” are easily irritated and upset. Some children are shy, uneasy in new situations. Differences in temperament affect how children get along with their families, and also affect how they get along in school.

9 dimensions of temperament

The well-known 9 dimensions of temperament as follows were identified by psychiatrists Alexander Thomas, Stella Chess and their colleagues. These may help parents better understand our own and our child’s behavior.

1. Sensory threshold- This refers to the amount of noise, pain, or other stimulation that causes a response on a scale from low to high sensitivity.
2. Activity level-This refers to the amount of movement and how long involved in the activity in daily circumstances.
3. Regularity-This refers to the amount of regularity in daily activities like eating and sleeping on a scale from irregular to regular.
4. Intensity- This refers to the amount of energy put into reactions on a scale from low to high.
5. Adaptability -This refers to the tendency toward changes in daily life on a scale from low to high adaptability.
6. Mood –This refers to the tendency to have happy or unhappy behavior and reactions on a scale from negative to positive.
7. Approach/Withdrawal-This refers to how easily a child adapts to new experiences such as foods, people, places and clothes on a scale from difficult to easy.
8. Persistence- This refers to the amount of time a child spends on an activity regardless of distractions on a scale from low to high persistence.
9. Distractibility -This refers to the tendency toward continuing activity when faced with noise, other activity on a scale of low to high distractibility.

Types of temperament

There are three basic types of temperaments as follows proposed by the researchers. By understanding these patterns, parents can tailor our parenting approach to suit our children’s unique needs.

• Easy or flexible children are generally calm, happy, adaptable and regular in sleeping and eating habits.
• Difficult, active, or feisty children are often easily upset, irregular in feeding and sleeping habits, fearful of new situations and intense in their reactions.
• Slow to warm up or cautious children are relatively inactive and sometimes requiring great attention to trivial details, tend to react negatively to new situations, but their reactions gradually become more positive with continuous exposure.

By the researchers, most children have some level of intensity on several temperament traits, but one dimension will usually dominate.

Understanding children’s temperament

Understanding children’s temperament will help parents get ready to react in various situations and meet the children’s needs. By better understanding a child’s temperament, parents can explain why the child might be behaving in a certain way and anticipate how the child will react to a particular event or situation. In addition, parents can communicate with the child efficiently, find out an effective approach to guide the child, and create a positive relationship with the child.

Understanding parents’ temperament

Parents also need to know their own temperament traits and be aware any pinpoint areas in which conflicts with their child arise, so that parents can prevent from temperament friction with the child as possible as they can, and prepare the first move to adapt the child in case the conflict happens.

Many scientific studies of temperament have showed that children’s health and development are influenced by their temperament and by their parents’ temperament.

Achievement in school is obviously related to a child’s ability, IQ, EQ, and to the quality of instruction he or she receives. Achievement is related to his or her temperament as well. Researchers found that a child who achieves is able to moderate physical activity appropriately, minimize distractions and focus on tasks, and persist.

How parents can help child by temperament

Although there is a debate on whether temperament is innate or can be nurtured, recent research results show that children’s individual differences are shaped by environmental experiences from infancy as well. Different parenting strategies may help to increase or decrease certain aspects of a child’s temperament. The family environment and children’s school environment have a major impact on whether children’s early temperaments remain stable and on whether their temperaments lead to good outcomes.

“Goodness of fit” theory

Thomas and Chess suggested the “goodness of fit” theory, which can be explained that in order to work better for children with different temperaments, need different parenting strategies.

Those children who are aggressive and difficult to manage benefit from a parenting style involving more restrictive control. Those shy children benefit from being encouraged by parents to explore new situations. Finally, some children pose greater challenges in certain contexts to parents and teachers are likely to benefit from additional support and education.

“Goodness of fit” between the child’s temperament and his or her environment impacts whether the child is growing and developing in a healthy environment. Parents and the child with different temperaments can have healthy relationships by working towards “goodness of fit.”

Tips for parents to guide kids

• Learn the value of children’s different temperaments. Look at the strengths and weakness with each temperament.
• Help the child know his or her own temperament. Self-awareness is the first step toward modifying behavior, talk about temperament to the child and help him or her understand how the temperament affects his or her feelings and behavior, and the impact on others as well as.
• Be aware of the child’s temperament and respect his or her uniqueness without comparing him or her to others.
• Be aware of parents’ own temperament and adjust parents’ natural responses when they have a conflict with the child’s responses.
• Set reasonable expectations for the child and parents.
• Change expectations as the child grows and changes.
• Communicate with the child frequently. Explain decisions and motivation. Listen to the child’s opinion and encourage teamwork.
• For easy or flexible child, parents need to set aside special times to talk about the child’s frustrations and hurts because he or she seldom has that, and once it happens the child has very weak tolerance on that.
• For difficult and active child, parents should provide areas for vigorous play to use his or her energy. Prepare the child for activity changes and use redirection to help him or her to transit from one place to another.
• Teach fussy kids anger management at a young age.
• For slow to warm up or cautious child, parents should stick to a routine, and give him or her ample time to get used to new situations.
• Adapt parenting strategies to plan for temperament tendencies.
• Help the child adapt his or her tendencies to grow, learn and develop in the real world.
• Be aware that typical behavior for children of a certain age at certain developmental stage may be in a developmentally appropriate way, rather than having a challenging temperament.
• Avoid labels. Be aware of the child’s many attributes; do not categorize the child at an early age, because labels may not accurately reflect him or her. Labels will limit the child future growth and development.
• Help the child to build self-esteem. Help Him or her think positively and develop a positive self-image.
• Be a good role model because children learn by imitation.

Theory of Multiple Intelligences

Howard Gardner’s Theory of Multiple Intelligences has had a profound impact on education world, especially in the United States. He established eight intelligences in his theory and believes that each person is intelligent in different areas.

• Linguistic intelligence is the ability to learn and use languages to achieve certain goals. Writers, poets, lawyers and speakers are among those who have high linguistic intelligence.
• Logical-mathematical intelligence is the ability to analyze problems logically, to solve mathematical problems, and investigate issues scientifically. Scientists and engineers are those examples who need a lot of the intelligence.
• Musical intelligence is the ability to understand and create music. Musicians, singers and dancers display a great musical intelligence.
• Bodily-kinesthetic intelligence is the ability to use mental abilities to manage bodily movements. Actors, dancers, and basketball players are among those who show the intelligence.
• Spatial intelligence is the ability to perceive the world visually, and recreate it in the mind. Spatial intelligence is highly developed, for example, in artists, architects, fashion designers and sculptors.
• Interpersonal intelligence is the ability to understand other people’s intentions, motivations. Educators, salespeople, religious and political leaders and counselors all need a well-developed interpersonal intelligence.
• Intrapersonal intelligence is an ability to understand one’s own emotions. Successful people usually have highly developed intrapersonal intelligence.
• Naturalist intelligence is the ability to recognize and classify certain features of the environment. An environmentalist is one of the good examples who demonstrate the intelligence.

Howard Gardner thinks that the eight intelligences rarely operate independently, and they are used at the same time and tend to complement each other as people develop skills or solve problems. He points out that the big challenge is how to best take advantage of the uniqueness, since people usually have a unique blend of several intelligences.

Tips for Parents

By Howard Gardner’s Theory of Multiple Intelligences, we understand that each child has a mix of intelligences and all eight intelligences are needed to live life well. As parents, our challenge is to identify our child’s intelligences and help him or her to build his or her strength while at the same time strengthen the child’ weak area.

By observing closely the child’s play and learning process, and talking with the child about the things that interest him or her and why, parents can make some assessment of the child’s ability. However, parents should be aware that a child’s abilities and strengths can change as he or she grows and develops. In order to help the child develop his or her potential, parents should to encourage the child’s exposure to and development in all intelligences, and believe that each child with certain intelligence can lead to success and achievement if identified, developed, and guided appropriately.