How Well Do You Know Your Child?

In U.S.A we often hear that parenting does matters. In China, we all know if the child is not well educated, everybody blames his or her parents. In Japan, we also hear that a child wins because his or her parents’ power. There is no doubt that family education acts a crucial role on children’s education. Parents are the most important teachers in a child’s life.

While we all know that by children’s developmental milestones, they were born as successful learners, they have incredible eagerness and ability to learn. However, as they grow, some are doing well in school, some are not. Each child has unique gifts to contribute to the learning process. It is our responsibility, as parents and teachers, to help children know what their gifts are and how to nurture them.

How parents help the child identify and respect his or her talents, learning strengths, and needs? How parents help the child discover his or her interests, dreams, passions, and goals? How parents help the child become an eager, self-directed learner? How parents help the child to maximize his or her learning ability and potential? In the next several posts, we are going to discuss these questions.

To learn more parenting skills, please refer to great parenting books.

Listen to Your Children

Communication With Children sometimes is not easy. Kids like talking. Sometime, they just keep talking, as parents, we hardly listen to them patiently. Communication is a two-way process. If we do not listen to our children carefully, we should not get upset or even angry with them if they do not listen to us.

Listening to your child

Some of parents including me feel that communicating with our children can be a difficult task at times. We feel like they’re not listening to us; they feel like we’re not listening to them. Although good listening and communications skills are essential to successful parenting, I think patience to our children is even more important. Our child’s feelings, views and opinions have worth, and we should make sure we take the time to sit down and listen openly and discuss with them honestly.

Respond carefully

It seems to be a natural tendency to react rather than to respond. We pass judgment based on our own feelings and experiences. However, responding means being receptive to our child’s feelings and emotions and allowing them to express themselves openly and honestly without fear of repercussion from us. By reacting, we send our child the message that their feelings and opinions are invalid. But by responding and asking questions about why the child feels that way, it opens a dialog that allows them to discuss their feelings further, and allows us a better understanding of where they’re coming from. Responding also gives us an opportunity to work out a solution or a plan of action with our child that perhaps they would not have come up with on their own. Our child will also appreciate the fact that maybe we do indeed understand how they feel.

Nowadays, most of parents are very busy in many things including working. It’s crucial in these situations to give your child your full and undivided attention. Kids are our future. Giving kids attention they need is so important for them to develop mentally and physically healthy. Put down your newspaper, stop doing dishes, or turn off the television so you can hear the full situation and make eye contact with your child. Keep calm, be inquisitive, and afterwards offer potential solutions to the problem. We should always remind us that kids need parents’ attention.

Help your child learn how to deal with stress

Help your child learn how to deal with stress. Don’t discourage your child from feeling upset, angry, or frustrated. Our initial instinct may be to say or do something to steer our child away from it, but this can be a detrimental tactic. Again, listen to your child, ask questions to find out why they are feeling that way, and then offer potential solutions to alleviate the bad feeling. Help your child manage his or her emotion.

Just as we do, our children have feelings and experience difficult situations. By actively listening to our children and participating with our child as they talk about it, it demonstrates to them that we do care, we want to help and we have similar experiences of our own that they can draw from. Remember, respond with your heart- don’t react irresponsibly. It’s no doubt that parents love their kids. Communication With Children is a important way to connect with your child.

To learn more parenting skills, please refer to great parenting books.