Underachievement problems exist at all ages; it is not easily overcome just because we get older. As adults, we do sometimes lose patience on many things including on our kids’ education. We did not put enough time to help our kids to get better understanding on their school courses. We sometimes even yell at our kids, when they got bad grades.
As we require our kids to try their best to achieve success, we have to do same thing ourselves first. As the proverb says, “It’s not what you say, it is what you do”. I think to set up a good role model for our kids, is the most powerful answer to the question “how can I help motivate my kids?”
We recommend Dr. Carol S. Dweck’s book Self-theories: Their Role in Motivation, Personality, and Development (Essays in Social Psychology), published by Psychology Press.
Dr.Dweck mensioned that the students who blossom at their school are the ones who believe that intellectual skills are things they can develop. They see the more difficult schoolwork as a challenge to be mastered through hard work, and they are determined to do what it takes to meet these new challenges.
Throughout the book, Dr.Dweck offers suggestions for teachers and parents on how to increase childrens adaptive belief systems. She also includes warnings about the wrong type of praise and decries the over-emphasis on self-esteem. Although these suggestions and warnings are helpful and thought provoking, she seems to be too prescriptive and forceful.